A similar analogy, shifting the focus from the result to the process, can be applied to the EV graph, where your winnings and all-in EV lines diverge from each other. Of course, it would be great if your winnings line matched the all-in EV line. The same can be said about mental feedback. Your mental feedback has its own winnings vs. all-in EV “processes” or “good plays,” which have less variance. So, if you could train your mind to interpret only whether you made a good move or not, instead of discussing the results, it would greatly help mitigate the impact of a downswing.
The second main aspect where we are affected by a downswing is the destruction of self-esteem. Self-esteem is a fundamental concept in our psychology about identity. Most theories about self-awareness state that we first perceive ourselves as ourselves through personal self-awareness. Even if the body changes or we undergo dramatic changes in consciousness or personality, self-awareness is the thread that accompanies us throughout life and even unites our feelings into a personality. We constantly carry all this in our minds, always adding something new. This is how we create a sense of self-awareness – through the stories we collect about ourselves.
Our humanity is always negotiating with self-awareness. So, the one who controls the story controls reality. The same applies to poker. Your identity as a poker player is limited by your success in poker. Poker is what you do. When you succeed in it, you give yourself approval, and when you fail, you destroy yourself from within, if not consciously then subconsciously. Thus, during a downswing, your self-awareness is often shattered.
Until now, poker has been a story about your climb upwards. You started with nothing, not even knowing the rules of the game well, and now you are here, halfway up the mountain. There hasn't been a single week of playing without learning something new, improving your game, or making some changes. However, a downswing shows everything in reverse in self-awareness. Suddenly, you start to feel like you're rolling back.
Self-awareness affects you very strongly. It's more than just what you think about yourself passively reflecting on your life. It's the feeling of tomorrow, lying in bed at night. It's your inner compass of goals and growth. It is the essence of human existence.
During a downswing, it feels like you're rolling down, and literally, that's what it is. But for most good players, downswings are just deviations from their true win rates. They should be winning, although thinking that way doesn't make it any better. All they feel is the descent. This way, optimism in poker is lost, along with well-being, security, and motivation. Consequently, their monetary EV is affected, and most importantly, their happiness is affected.
